The Allure of Vamps

Why do we love vampires so much? I’m not gonna lie: I adore them with an undead passion. With few exceptions, these fictional masters of the night embody, literally and symbolically, the epitome of coolness: super strong, super sexy, super rich, super sophisticated, super color coordinated. But with the hand of authorly godliness, I can make anyone all those things. What is it about vampires in particular that fascinates and rivets us?

Obviously, we love the idea that these creatures live forever. I mean, not to be a bummer, but at best, we puny mortals can expect to stick around a max of 100 or so years. This is but an eyeblink in an undead’s life! To folks, especially in Western, youth-worshipping, death-denying cultures, this can seem pretty sexy. And unlike zombies or ghosts, vampires remain not only corporeal but forever young. Heck, not only are they young, but they’re beautiful. This is never more apparent when Bella becomes a vampire in the Twilight Series. She not only remains an eternal 18-year-old, but she gets a vampire makeover that makes her achingly beautiful. Because apparently, becoming a vampire means rejecting mortality while embracing all its beauty ideals!

This can seem pretty alluring, given how terrified we Western citizens are of death. It’s no coincidence that the vampire emerged as a popular culture staple in the late 19th century, when the industrial era reached its height. In the 19th and 20th centuries, industrial Westerners moved away from farms and into the arms of cities and institutions – like hospitals, mortuaries, meat packing plants, and nursing homes -- that increasingly removed reminders and realities of death from our everyday lives. As our life expectancies expanded thanks to medicine and hygiene and we learned to live cleaner, more hermetically sealed lives, death loomed more and more like a bogeyperson.

What better way to sort of face our fear of death while simultaneously soothing us that death could be beautiful, sexy, and most of all, UNdead?

All this is to say nothing about vampires and their oh-so-convenient wealth and nobility. Because becoming a vampire turns former humans into investing geniuses and, anachronistically but compellingly, also royalty? Oh, whatever. If being a vampire means sporting a bored, goth aesthetic for all eternity while reveling in my newfound brokering skills, sign me up. 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Public Peeing: A Case for Gender Desegregation

Image
I just wrote a scene about a topic near and dear all our hearts: public bathrooms. Below is an excerpt from my book. “Yeah, so how come girls and boys have different bathrooms?” … Josh thought for a time. “I don’t know for sure,” she said. “But I read about it in the Twelve’s* books. I think they did it and we inherited it from them. You know we live in buildings they built and use sewer systems they fashioned.” Garyn shook her head. “Well, we do. We owe our infrastructure to the Twelves. They were great builders and developers. Not so great at taking care of each other, but you know that…I guess they thought women and men should pee separately.” “Why?” Garyn persisted. “We don’t eat in separate places.” … “I don’t know, Garyn,” she said finally. “…I do know the Twelves thought a lot about sex. I think they were worried they wouldn’t be able to control themselves if they knew the person right next to them was only half-clothed.” Lynna snorted. “What about onesex or
Read more

Bustin' Some Welfare Myths

Image
In my classrooms, and sometimes on Facebook, a topic comes up so predictably and with such frequency I can almost mouth the words as they begin to emerge from students’ earnest mouths: Gotta watch those those welfare recipients to ensure they don't  Abuse the System© . The thing is, I don't know if they know they're the very recipients we should be watching. Yeah, you heard right: welfare. I’m not going to pretty it up by saying “recipients of social assistance” or “family assistance.” I’m going old school and using the most emotional language I can: Welfare. Recipients. Full disclosure, as bloggers are wont to do: I grew up on welfare. When I was four, my mother grabbed my two sisters and me and fled a violent situation. We slept in our car, bounced among various relatives, rented tiny trailers. Finally, we landed ourselves Section 8 housing , which meant a constant roof and our own beds. I’m not going to lie: The highlight of our month included waiting by the
Read more

The Fat Twin Phenomenon

Image
My identical tw-- uh, best friend (left) and me Did you know I have a twin? I do. Lots of them, in fact. Or, if not a twin, at least a sister. Millions. My poor mom. Picture this: Two women sit next to one another on a shuttle to a hotel in Chicago. The shuttle driver grins at them in the mirror and asks, “Are you two twins?” They get the same question a few days later. A few years later, while one of them visits the other’s workplace, several people approach the smiling duo and ask if they’re sisters. They’re not twins. They’re not even sisters. In fact, they are separated by years (nine), hair (one has long, straight, blonde hair, while the other’s is curly and brown), height (the blonde is two or three inches taller), and body shapes (the blonde is more hourglass). Their eye colors and face shapes are completely different, and no one would ever confuse their voices over the phone. However, they have three things in common that automatically, and apparently, render t
Read more